I'm fine!

I used to want to let everyone in on my character and personality, so that maybe, perhaps I could find the one able to totally understand me.

I was wandering at school at recess, and picking in my mind people who I thought would be advisable, people who I never used to talk to before, people who did not know me. Not at all...

So many words I used, trying to explain what I had in my head. Trying to analyze the storm that was bursting in my heart.
But words can lie and, hell, even at their best they lack precision...

And the only thing I eventually achieved, was to plant false impressions to a noticeable amount of 5 % of the people working/ attending at my school. Different impressions, to each and every one of them separately. Wow, Self, now that's an achievement! Congrats!

...Then I saw a specialist. A psychologist, friend of my mum's who she would also consult when she was younger.

And I saw the light.

The fact that she is unbiased and unaffected by her own hands-on experience, rephrasing my thoughts in a more.. professional kind of way, seemed to be exactly what I needed. You see, she would rephrase my messed-up thoughts, and putting them in the correct order so that I could hear what I was saying twice, and also in two different ways. And one of the first things she told me was that: The answer lies within you. You have it inside, and all you've got to do is listen to that oppressed little voice speaking, in your heart. God, how correct she was...

Now do you want to know how many of those I would consult were able to eventually understand me like I wished?
None.

Never let yourself reach to the point of desperation. It makes you do stuff that you later end to think of as hopeless and fruitless.

Thanks for reading. Hope that I helped. Take care of yourselves!

Best wishes and merry Christmas,

Joss